Todd

auraesque

I'm moving in a week, and as much as I hate moving I'm really excited. Megan and I went to look at the apartment yesterday and we started talking about what we were going to do to it. It got me really excited about it and I talked about it all day yesterday. It kind of annoyed Megan. I feel like I'm annoying her a lot lately which kind of worries me because we're going to be living together, but I'm just being me, that guy that gets overly excited about over a hundred things, and I refuse to change. She told me she was really stressed out with the end of school and her trip to Italy being so close, so I'm going to rub most of it off on that. Hopefully when she comes back we'll be back to the way we were. 

Moving on to a similar but slightly different note, I have spent my entire life trying to make others happy. So much in fact that I hardly get the things I want. That is stopping today, effective immediately. It's as little as wanting the last piece of cake or pizza and letting someone else have it just to make them happy and as big as appologizing to my ex and friends for things I did not do wrong and that I was not in the wrong for just to appease an argument. I deserve to be happy too, and dammit I'm going to start being happy.

I'm not saying I'm always going to get my way. It's a fine line between being a confident human being who doesn't take shit and being a complete asshole. Hopefully I won't come across as the latter, but we'll see. Even it is better than what I have been.

And because this post has gone everywhere, why not include a meme? This one's from trileaderroses.

Current Mood:

awake

Sinspawn
-- Complete revamp. Someone once told me it's best to focus on your strengths. With that in mind I'm making my domain a lot more personal and word-heavy. I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing, but it's more me and I'm satisfied.

Solitaire
-- New layout.
-- Expansion to cover comics, because (again) I am a geek. I fear I'm not alone, though ;).  I think in_solis and terra will appreciate the new content, especially Megan, knowing the comics she let me borrow months ago are finally going to use.

Pawn
-- New layout.

New sites
-- Edge shrine with terra  because it has to be done.
-- Auron tribute with Aeryvae to compliment Poltergeist and give the old man the love he deserves.
-- Squall/Rinoa thing with Aeryvae because after five months I can't turn back now. To tell you the truth Aery's section of this tribute has been done for a while. Mine ...has been killed by every force known to man practically. I plan on finishing it a third time, though. I have to.
-- FFVI collective with Aeryvae, Alex, Alex, and Megan. I might take on Gau and Cyan, too.
-- Soul Calibur randomness.

Now watch: two or three of these things will actually get done.

Current Mood:

hyper

a. Post a list of 25 fandoms.
b. Have your friends list guess your favorite character from each one.
c. When guessed, bold the line, include the character name, and write a sentence about why you like that character.

Like terra I'm going to put these in order of somewhat difficulty.

1. Final Fantasy X - Tidus, guessed by terra cause well, duh. See here.

2. Final Fantasy VI - Sabin, guessed by terra. I admit his blitzes pulled me in, but his devotion for his brother and his all-out personality kept me a fan.

3. Final Fantasy IX - Steiner, guessed by terra. He's one of the few in the game I can stand.

terra

terra

7. Captain Planet
8. Supernatural
9. Will and Grace
10. X-Men - Storm, guessed by in_solis.  I would have taken Jean Grey too because they go back and forth with me in the games and movies. I like Storm's powers a lot, but I love Jean Grey's story.
11. Everworld
12. Animorphs
13. Harry Potter - Ron guessed by in_solis and akikanaI don't really talk about Harry Potter a lot, so I wasn't expecting this to be guessed. I don't know why I like Ron; I just do.
14. The Lord of the Rings
15. Super Mario Bros (series) - Luigi guessed by  in_solis. He jumps higher than Mario and he wears green. There's really not a lot more than that.
16. Time Quartet (by Madeleine L'Engle)
17. Beowulf - Grendel guessed by in_solis. John Gardner's Grendel did it all for me. He's a character I feel for now.
18. Great Expectations
19. Mythology - Loki guessed by in_solis , and I like him mainly because of Everworld.
20. Friends
21. Mortal Kombat
22. Drawn Together - Zandir guessed by in_solis . He's hilariously gay. I love how dramatic he is. And he likes grapes.
23. Queer As Folk
24. Charlie's Angels
25. American Idol (Favorite contestant ever)

Current Mood:

bored

Today is the 6th which means there are only 24 more days before I move into my new apartment, and I am ecstatic. I want to start packing things but I know I'll just miss them if they're put away too early. I'll probably end up waiting until the last week.

...I just realized I haven't been writing about this. Let me catch you guys up. Right now I have a one bedroom apartment. Megan (from lost-fragment.org), my domain affiliate and one of my good friends told me she was looking for a place; she wants to move out after she goes to Italy in May. Because Megan is my Grace Adler, we decided to get a two bedroom apartment. Our rent is going to be cheaper for us both, and I'm going to have someone to play video games with 24/7! Okay, not 24/7, because not even we can play video games that much, but dude! All of my friends really like Megan, and just having someone there is going to be awesome. It's funny when I think about it. I met Megan on Amphisbena and Livejournal and she's quickly become a great friend in real life (Because you online people are imaginary ;)).

Anyway, I'm moving in in May when she goes to Italy, and when she comes back in June I'll have most of the place ready.

...So that's what's going on. Yeah. My life's not that exciting.

Current Mood:

busy

So I was driving down the road the other day slightly annoyed because I was behind a really slow old man, when I noticed the bumper sticker on his car in front of me. It said "Homophobic". He had a couple more bumper stickers; one said "Support our troops" and the other had the Jesus fish.

As a gay guy, I was so frickin pissed. To me that's equivalent to someone putting an anti-black bumper sticker on his car. Why the unnecessary hate? How do gay people even affect him? I can almost guarantee he doesn't get hit on by gay guys. We're not affecting his life in any way.

I guess I started paying attention to bumper stickers after that, and just yesterday I saw one on an old lady's car that said "Marriage = man + woman". While slightly more acceptable to me than "Homophobic" (Sadly it's a current political view, which it should have never been.), it still made me cringe.

Why do people hate us so much? What are we doing to ruin their lives?

Current Mood:

sleepy

I went out to eat at my favorite restaurant, The Macaroni Grill with five of my closest friends, which was kind of hard because I could only invite six people. I hated having to choose a top six, and one of them didn't even come. (It's okay, Bill! I missed you though!) Oh well. A really hot waiter came and sang Happy Birthday to me in Italian in a very awful and pitchy voice. He was hot though, so I dealt. ;) My friends said I was turning three shades of red, though. The Happy Birthday song always is the most embarrassing part.

After dinner Megan, Josh, and I went to pick up my new friend Eli and then we went to a bar downtown and I drank some Vodka and Red Bull. Needless to say I was hyper the rest of the night. From there we went to The Castle, a gay bar here in Greenville, and I took turns dancing with Megan and Eli. Hard to say which one I enjoyed more, but Eli's hot. Sorry for not floating that way, Megan. ;) One of my exes works at the desk there, so I got in free. Can't beat that.

Katie (Aeryvae) drew me something for my birthday, but she said it is going to be late. I can't wait to see what it is! More wall art, yay.

[Edit] - Oh! I forgot to comment on the ticket. Eli, Josh and I are going to Asheville and staying in a hotel overnight. The tickets hadn't arrived yet, so Josh gave my gift on a sheet of paper that said something like "I O U one admission to..." It took a while for it to hit me, but I'm really really excited now. I love country music and Jason Aldean is my favorite singer. And who doesn't like Tim McGraw?

Current Mood:

bouncy

I think the worst part of traveling for me is that I have to be away from Huckleberry three to four days out of the week. As much as I didn't want a dog when he was given to me, I've grown really attached to him. I had some nightmares last night and woke up shaking, and Huck started kissing my face. He knows how to make me feel good, and he makes it his job to do that.

I love the team I started traveling with this week. A woman named Melody and I are the only ones from my company on the team, and we get along awesome. I really like the Ingles people, too, and I actually enjoyed staying in hotels since I got my own room and had a friend's laptop. My new laptop will be here at the beginning of March, and I can't wait. I can't really build websites on my friends' laptop, and having something that is yours just makes it better anyway. American Idol kept me entertained as well.

Next week we're in South Carolina so I get to stay home in my own bed. With Huckleberry. And I can play Suikoden. Neither of the TVs in the two hotels I stayed in had the little white, yellow, and red holes to hook my Playstation 2 up with, so I didn't get to play my game. I vented to Alex about it and have to agree with what she told me: A life without Suikoden isn't worth living.

Not really, but yeah.

Current Mood:

bouncy

When we walked into the restaurant I noticed right away that there were a bunch of young straight couples, and I immediately felt awkward. Why though? I thought I was very comfortable with my sexuality, but after last night I guess not. I think most of it is Kevin. Some of it is probably me, too.

When I dated Kevin he was very insecure about being gay and worried constantly about people finding out. He told me we'd never live together again because he didn't want anyone to know he was gay. It's part of the reason I broke up with him, but that's another story. The point is, I guess I got so used to hiding it with him that now that I'm with people who are comfortable with it, I still feel the need to hide it, and as a result I feel uncomfortable.

I decided I needed to think about it and make some decisions, and so I did. I want to be comfortable with it. It's who I am, and it's not going to change. The biggest influencing factor is this: if we are uncomfortable with who we are and can't accept ourselves, how can we expect the rest of the world to accept us?

I'm not going to say I'm going to be comfortable from here on out, but dammit, I'm gonna try.

Current Mood:

thoughtful

terra

I was originally going to make a Captain Planet layout for my domain, but Captain Planet images are so hard to find and even harder to work with. My journal needed a new layout anyways.

Pretty excited about my job. I got a promotion and a pay raise. I was pretty bummed about it at first because I have to travel now. I knew I had to take it because I need the money and benefits, and while I wasn't happy about it, I was getting used to the idea. I got my schedule for the next month, though, and the most I'm  out of town is three days a week! I also have a full week that's in South Carolina where I won't have to travel, and some of the places in North Carolina and Georgia are close enough for me to be able to stay home. It's looking really good now. On the days I travel, I'll just bring my PS2 and laptop, and work on my websites and play video games. It'll work out pretty good, I think.

Current Mood:

chipper

So I renewed my lease yesterday. It's really interesting because I was planning on moving in May. My landlord offered to deduct twenty dollars a month from my rent if I stayed, and I'd have to buy a washer and dryer if I moved into a place that didn't have them included. Not to mention I'd probably owe a deposit at a new place, and I'd have to pay rent for both places at some point so that I could move my stuff. Financially, renewing was a better option for me this year. I'll save more money throughout the year so that I can move if I want to next May.

I detailed my entire apartment this week, cleaning out my storage closet, my freezer, my medicine cabinet, and the works. I also had two new shelves built for my built-in bookcase beside the fireplace, and I put all my movies on them. It looks awesome, if I can say so myself.

I feel like I have a new apartment.

Current Mood:

busy

Haikus! ...about Final Fantasy characters.

Here's the ones I've done so far:

"Tidus"
Oh iconoclast,
Change a world that is not your own
And save the living.

"Rinoa"
Fall from the heavens
Oh intrepid angel, and
Rescue a lion.

"Sabin"
Flee the war-sick realm
Or hold sway of Figaro?
Choose: flip a coin.

"Steiner"
Not your own person,
Are you a pawn or a knight?
Reject servitude.

"Wakka"
Brother, teacher, and--
Her faithful guardian with
A random accent.

Alex's are better. ;)

Sorry for the lack of updates. I'd make a cool excuse, but the truth is I've just been lazy.

Current Mood:

cold

Look what I did instead of my Rinoa thing tonight. ;-)

They canceled the North Carolina set for tomorrow, so I'm home wasting time. Gotta go back to North Carolina tomorrow night for Thursday morning unless the weather's bad, but I'll definitely be back and active here after Thursday.

Random: anyone feel like drawing Sabin? Haha.

Current Mood:

accomplished